life is never as easy as it seems, people are not who they appear to be, and your words hurt more than you could ever know. sometimes all that gets me through are my friends, Jesus, and my music. i may seem tough and mean, but i feel alot more than i show. believe me, those "little digs" or "harmless jokes" you throw around like cheap candy make a very big impact. they play through my head 24/7, day and night, even when i'm at my happiest. i know that i am not the nicest person or i seem like a female dog, but its mostly a front. if you only how much i hurt. how close i am to tears most of the day. how much i just want to go home and sleep or hide somewhere to escape it all. but i can't. i have to deal with people who have no idea what is going on in my life so they just say whatever pops into that tiny little useless brain of theirs.
i usually say some of what i feel, if its mean or makes someone think twice before saying whatever they want to me, but i dont say HALF of what i think. trust me. you have noooo idea.
i felt like i needed to explain my attitude and personality, because i get taken the wrong way so many times because people see what the want to and hear the same. if you had to live in my shoes for a day, a week, a month, you would understand. my life is not as it appears. no ones is. take my advice and i will too. think twice before you just say whatever. it could be "the piece of hay that broke the camel's back". nough said.
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